Where does one truly experience love first? Can love
be felt and then lost along the way? Does it really matter if one does not
truly love and yet be loved truly by the people around him/her, I mean, by
his/her family? These questions are not meant to be answered. Rather, I raised
them to serve as guide questions only for reflection. I am therefore inviting you to
journey with me in this reflective blog of mine.
It is a cliché but I
just have to say it again, that the family is the basic unit of society. In the
mind of the Church, the family is considered as a domestic church. It is logical to say therefore, that as the basic
unit of society and as a domestic church,
the family is the foundation of both society (civic society) and the Church, in
other words, humanity as a whole. Well, we all belong to one BIG family; we
live and die in one and the same world.
In my previous blog, I
dealt on the theme that love is the binding force of family life. But what happens
when the family, that is the true sanctuary of love, fails to fulfill its job?
What happens to love now when it has no place to go since its sanctuary, the
family, is not anymore capable of keeping it “safe”? I hope these questions can
help us see the threats families now are facing in our present society.
I might be wrong in my
opinion, but the way I see it, the movements brought about by secularist and
materialistic lifestyles have strong influence on the minds of married couples
who are parents themselves. The values of the world are getting more attentions
now than the used-to-be God-centered and family-oriented views that keep
relationships among parents and children strong. The impact of the social media
where freedom of expression seems to have no limit, is now taking control over
the family setup and the victims seem not to be aware of it.
But who are the
victims here? I believe it is both the parents and the children. And this can
lead to many possibilities. I hope I do not sound as somebody claiming I know a
lot about these matters. I am only sharing my reflections based on my opinions
and observations from what I read and saw. And for this post, I will only limit
my sharing on the factors affecting parents’ separation.
FACTORS AFFECTING PARENTS’ SEPARATION
1.
Legalization of divorce. Even when the time divorce was not yet legal, for sure there were already
parents getting separated. In the Philippines for example, we don’t have a law
on divorce yet, but in practice, there are lot of parents who are separated and
the children are the ones who are most affected. Now imagine what happens when
it is already legalized. In other countries, the practice is “exchanging wives
and husbands”… For those who are pro-divorce, I respect your stance. I am just explaining
here what I believe as the bad effects of this to family.
2. The view that compatibility is equal to love. This is how the
world understands love. Well, maybe because of too much emphasis on
self-expression brought about by the social media, it is not anymore unusual to
hear married couple separating after finding out that they are just too
different from each other in so many things, like their favorite foods are not
the same, favorite colors, attitudes toward social issues, opinions about how
to deal with problems in life and so on… There are other issues related to this
factor I cannot further explain here because they are either sensitive or require
mature audience.
3. Many other factors. I hope you will
understand but I only intend to write a short blog and so I cannot elaborate
more on this point. Thank you.
As my conclusion, I
would just like to share a few thoughts on how this separation of parents would
affect the children. I believe when parents are separated, it is the children
who will suffer much. And so the real victims here are the children and not really
their parents.
Disclaimer: I do not claim any of the photos used in this post as mine. Credit goes to the owner.
Disclaimer: I do not claim any of the photos used in this post as mine. Credit goes to the owner.
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